And on a Related Note...

JUST IN TIME FOR SPRING

By Ellis Weiner
Introducing GOING OUTSIDE, the astounding multipurpose activity platform that will revolutionize the way you spend your time.
GOING OUTSIDE is not a game or a program, not a device or an app, not a protocol or an operating system. Instead, it’s a comprehensive experiential mode that lets you perceive and do things firsthand, without any intervening media or technology.
GOING OUTSIDE:
1. Supports real-time experience through a seamless mind-body interface. By GOING OUTSIDE, you’ll rediscover the joy and satisfaction of actually doing something. To initiate actions, simply have your mind tell your body what to do—and then do it!
Example: Mary has one apple. You have zero apples. Mary says, “Hey, this apple is really good.” You think, How can I have an apple, too? By GOING OUTSIDE, it’s easy! Simply go to the market—physically—and buy an apple. Result? You have an apple, too.
Worried about how your body will react to GOING OUTSIDE? Don’t be—all your normal functions (respiration, circulation, digestion, etc.) continue as usual. Meanwhile, your own inboard, ear-based accelerometer enables you to assume any posture or orientation you wish (within limits imposed by Gravity™). It’s a snap to stand up, sit down, or lie down. If you want to lean against a wall, simply find a wall and lean against it.
2. Is completely hands-free. No keyboards, mice, controllers, touch pads, or joysticks. Use your hands as they were meant to be used, for doing things manually. Peeling potatoes, applauding, shooting baskets, scratching yourself—the possibilities are endless.
3. Delivers authentic 3-D, real-motion video, with no lag time or artifacts. Available colors encompass the entire spectrum to which human eyesight is sensitive. Blacks are pure. Shadows, textures, and reflections are beyond being exactly-like-what-they-are. They are what they are.
GOING OUTSIDE also supports viewing visuals in a full range of orientations. For Landscape Mode, simply look straight ahead—at a real landscape, if you so choose. To see things to the left or the right, shift your eyes in their sockets or turn your head from side to side. For Portrait Mode, merely tilt your head ninety degrees in either direction and use your eyes normally. Vision-correcting eyeglasses not included but widely available.
4. Delivers “head-free” surround sound. No headphones, earbuds, speakers, or sound-bar arrays required—and yet, amazingly, you hear everything. Sound is supported over the entire audible spectrum via instantaneous audio transmission. As soon as a noise occurs and its sound waves are propagated to your head, you hear it, with stunning realism, with your ears.
Plus, all sounds, noises, music, and human speech arrive with remarkable spatial-location accuracy. When someone behind you says, “Hey, are you on drugs, or what?,” you’ll hear the question actually coming from behind you.
5. Supports all known, and all unknown, smells. Some call it “the missing sense.” But once you start GOING OUTSIDE you’ll revel in a world of scent that no workstation, media center, 3-D movie, or smartphone can hope to match. Inhale through your nose. Smell that? That’s a smell, which you are experiencing in real time.
6. Enables complete interactivity with inanimate objects, animals, and Nature™. Enjoy the texture of real grass, listen to authentic birds, or discover a flower that has grown up out of the earth. By GOING OUTSIDE, you’ll be astounded by the number and variety of things there are in the world.
7. Provides instantaneous feedback for physical movement in all three dimensions. Motion through 3-D environments is immediate, on-demand, and entirely convincing. When you “pick up stuff from the dry cleaner’s,” you will literally be picking up stuff from the dry cleaner’s.
To hold an object, simply reach out and grasp it with your hand. To transit from location to location, merely walk, run, or otherwise travel from your point of origin toward your destination. Or take advantage of a wide variety of available supported transport devices.
8. Is fully scalable. You can interact with any number of people, from one to more than six billion, simply by GOING OUTSIDE. How? Just go to a place where there are people and speak to them. But be careful—they may speak back to you! Or remain alone and talk to yourself.
9. Affords you the opportunity to experience completely actual weather. You’ll know if it’s hot or cold in your area because you’ll feel hot or cold immediately after GOING OUTSIDE. You’ll think it’s really raining when it rains, because it is.
10. Brings a world of cultural excitement within reach. Enjoy access to museums, concerts, plays, and films. After GOING OUTSIDE, the Louvre is but a plane ride away.
11. Provides access to everything not in your home, dorm room, or cubicle. Buildings, houses, shops, restaurants, bowling alleys, snack stands, and other facilities, as well as parks, beaches, mountains, deserts, tundras, taigas, savannahs, plains, rivers, veldts, meadows, and all the other features of the geophysical world, become startlingly and convincingly real when you go to them. Take part in actual sporting events, or observe them as a “spectator.” Walk across the street, dive into a lake, or jump on a trampoline surrounded by happy children. After GOING OUTSIDE, you’re limited not by your imagination but by the rest of Reality™.
Millions of people have already tried GOING OUTSIDE. Many of your “friends” may even be GOING OUTSIDE right now! Why not join them and see what happens?